Eulogy for Dr. James Dobson

We are here today to remember the late Dr. James Dobson – the man who taught a generation of parents that the gospel could be summed up into two words: spare not.

He called it parenting advice. Many of us call it trauma. If you were deemed a “strong-willed child,” then you know your role as the enemy in a holy war fought with leather belts and Bible verses. Dobson called the breaking of our will love. So many of us never broke – we simply just survived.

His everlasting legacy is an empire of fear. He taught parents, even young parents like me, that children were to be controlled – women were to be subjugated – politics were to be cornered. Focus on the Family was never about family, it was simply about power. The church applauded when there was a new book, a new broadcast, and a new crusade to be waged.

But, Dobson never expected these “strong-willed” children to grow up, to find their voice, to turn and burn down the ugly, abusive system he created. The stubbornness he sought to beat out of us was in fact, resiliency….resolve…. Our very own will was the very thing that saved us.

Rest in peace, dear Dr. Dobson. May heaven be free from belts, purity pledges, and political swords. As for the rest of us, we will keep our will strong and our backs straight, not to spite you, but because we survived you.

Signed,

A Strong-Willed Child